Profile

Hey m'dears!

My name is Ellie Aitken (actually, no, it isn't, but I'm not telling you my real name so there), I'm twenty two years old and currently off work sick - when well I work as a Care Assistant. It's a shit (harrharr) job but someone has to do it! I plan to go on and study nursing at the University of Edinburgh to become a Mental Health Nurse. The question is not what or where but when.

Music (http://www.last.fm/user/roulette) is important to me, as is my computer.

For a while I studied Internet Computer Science at the University of St Andrews. This experience only lasted a year and a half but it has a large influence on my life, for the experiences I had, the people I met, what I learned about myself. Therein lies a lot of stuff I don't want to go back to.

I live to be myself. I don't pretend to be simple, but then again, I don't pretend to be complicated either (truth be known, I don't know what I am). I have enough problems as it is without having to think of ways to conceal my past. I prefer to tell the truth.

I fall in love with my eyes tight shut and my mind wide open (far too damn easily).

Apparently I'm intimidating. I'm a nice person, really. I'm just scary. And hyper.

I normally greet people with the word "narf". I have my own language. I say "squeebleyarrgh" a lot, especially the "of doom" varity, and have a thing about exploding chihuahuas. Random words make the world go round.

I'm known as The Monochromatic Sheep, Roulette (Rou/Roubear/Roul), Squeeblegirl, Elliekins (to those I like), Perky Goth, Bumble, Strawberry, GollyGoth, Oddball and The Head Fruitcake.

My natural habitat is mess, but my friends are mean and make me tidy my room. If I could I would live off peanut butter on toast, tea, strawberry lollipops and custard creams. But I can't, and I'm somewhat lactose (and soya) intolerant, so I'm vegan back to veggie.

My friends mean the world to me. They stop me from falling completely apart.

I aim to leave peoples lives slightly better than when I found them (though this is easier said than done!)

As a note, I suffer from long term, medicated, mental health problems. This place is where I do most of my venting. If you can't handle the occassional trigger and mention of abuse (whether it be physical, verbal, sexual, self or substance), you shouldn't read this.

I write what I like in here. It's a part of my "recovery" and helps me keep the remaining sanity I have. I'm also amazingly disordered with dates and it keeps me on track. If you don't like that, you don't have to read this: go away. If anyone tries to prevent me from saying what I like here I'll remove them. Consider yourself warned.